on second thought.

you are right diana.

i wanted dr liu to tell me i was all good.
that the cancer was gone.
that i was in the clear.
she smiled (because she is used to me egging her),
and said "you are in remission."
she wouldnt say it.

so why can't i?

is it like taking away the power of a birthing mama
by telling her she was delivered of a healthy child?
instead of the truth?
that SHE pushed that baby out with all of her power and might?

I AM CANCER FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

maybe now i can celebrate more deeply.
let go of that last bit of fear,
because it does me no good to hang onto it.

thank you friend.